Tuesday 17 May 2011

What goes up...

...must come down. Crashing down in our case.

Murano chandelier - before

Yes, this is the other story about our retro Murano chandelier.

It seems Wazza the Electrician, whom I will call Warwick forever more, was wrong when he confidently rebuffed my questioning about the chandelier's stability.

"Nah, this chandelier's going nowhere," he said good-naturedly as he made the final adjustments.

Jason installed a bayonet fitting - after
We enjoyed our lovely light for 36 hours before it all went awry on a sunny Saturday afternoon.

Crash. 


Shatter. 


F#!%.

Jason sustained a few gashes on his leg; spilling some claret. Miraculously the dining table was spared because the weekend newspapers were strewn across it.

The almighty crash just scared the sweet bejesus out of me as I was seated at the table...No children were injured - they were zoned out in front of the television instead.

When Mr Rooney, our "find the funny side to things" builder, popped around a few hours later, the tension in the air was instantly lifted.

Earlier, Jason had been ranting. Poor old Warwick's ears would've been burning had he heard Jason's defamatory remarks about his chandelier hanging credentials. I was in an acute state of temporary depression; in the foetal position.

Mr Rooney had himself a good old belly laugh. Mostly because he was there when Warwick made his reassuring remarks to me about the chandelier going nowhere. His amusement was a welcome relief.

We inspected the "hook" that held the chandelier in place and we deduced poor old Warwick's command of the law of physics is wanting. Wazza, Wazza, Wazza!

Luckily, only nine of the Murano crystals were broken. We've put the chandelier away for now.

We are waiting for our courage to return.

38 comments:

  1. Jeepers, that would have scared you to death!!!

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  2. Thank goodness for the weekend papers and kids' television (two of my favourite things)...

    I loved the look of your chandelier - be brave - perhaps Mr Rooney is a better bet than Warwick. Surely it's Warwick when you're cross with him?

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  3. Hope it didn't take too many years off your life?!

    So glad no one was hurt (It looked amazing while it lasted if that helps!)

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  4. Oh no!! We had a few lights fall at once (unprecious lights) in our Darwin house, frightened the life out of me. One landed on my head while i was doing the dishes - NOTHING good happens while you're doing the dishes, then we went to the ensuite & found that light smashed. Couldn't recall a jet (we lived on an Air Force base) or earthquake, freaky.
    But to think anything which has made the journey from Murano to your home then falls, oh, heart breaking. Love Posie

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  5. Bloody Hell, Bris - that's quite a human error! I bet your electrician has had a couple of sleepless nights over it.

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  6. what a nightmare!! Lucky no-one, including the table, was hurt.

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  7. I think poor old Warwicks ears deserved to be burning! Crikey that must have been a very large crash. Thankfully nothing hurt except Warwicks pride. I think you should be brave.... And get him to put it back up again. I'm sure he'll be very sure about it his time. xx

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  8. Oh Anita, no. I'd be curled up in a foetal position for a week if that happened to me. It wazza nightmare alright!

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  9. NOooooo! At least you got a lovely photo of it before it crashed. I'd be hiding if I were Wazza.

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  10. Oh no. I'm not going to write anything because it'd be quite scathing. So I won't comment. But I do feel your pain.

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  11. Wazza needs a damn good spanking. I'm so glad no one was hurt.

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  12. Oh my gosh!! Famous last words, huh? I'd say "bloody electricians" but I live with one so I won't say that but I do remember when Lyn installed my chandy in the studio that he told me not to hang anything off it. I'm feeling nervous now...
    At least no one - including the table, was hurt!
    x

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  13. Oh no!!!! That is so sad! Your beautiful chandelier.... I hope you can find replacements for the broken pieces - Oh and wazza certainly owes you a few love jobs thats for sure. ;-)

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  14. Wow - lucky no one was seriously hurt. What a silly man.

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  15. You poor dear, what a shock. I recall that Ali of From the Right Bank had a catastrophic Murano chandelier fall as well - are they cursed? And the room was looking so very well.

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  16. Bugger!. I hope Warwick's last name isn't Capper!

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  17. That is a shocker - you poor thing!!

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  18. Oh dear, that is devastating for you. Luckily no severed limbs and only 9 crystals broken. Poor Wazza, not the way you want to become blog-famous. Gotta watch those electricians- in our last house I came home from work to first hand witness a power point being merrily installed INSIDE a shower cavity.Mel:)

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  19. Oh no!!! I would have had some choice words to say like Jason as well. I'm sure you'll be able to get it repaired and thenhave it re-installed by someone other than Wazza!!! Ange

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  20. Oh my goodness... I wasn't expecting to read this at all! You are all so lucky that you weren't hurt! I guess you could get it repaired and re-hung but please find another electrician first!

    Take care and best wishes,
    Natasha.

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  21. Oh no! That's terrible! It looks so lovely up there. I hope you can find replacement crystals, Tam x

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  22. This is a horribly sad story!!! That chandelier is fantastic and I feel terrible for you that not only is it no longer hanging, but pieces broke. Grrrr. I'm angry with you!!

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  23. Yikes! Near death by chandelier... not a good way to go. I'm glad the table is okay xx

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  24. You know I feel your pain. Maybe you should do a guest post for me.

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  25. Oh no! A beautiful Chandelier. At least no one is really hurt. Mimi x

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  26. Bloody hell first sprang to mind. Then Deb of The Loyalist Cottage.
    This type of event would have brought on some ugly crying from me, I have no doubt.
    Will you be approaching Warwick about this? A refund perhaps?

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  27. i feel a bit bad but this made me laugh out loud. i could just imagine the surprised look on your faces and the aftermath.... sorry
    ~laura

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  28. As soon as i read your title you can guess what expletive I said...I cannot speak about (yes me who can't shut up) or even look at that picture...I just feel sick for you. After all this time it is finally up and looking fab...aargh!! Poor Wazza too!

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  29. Wazza wazza not the electrician you needed! I am glad everybody's ok though and it is good news that even that lovely light fitting is not badly damaged..and the table..that is amazing!

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  30. A three way conversation

    I walk in and Wazza is fixing something that looks like a rusty metal sculpture of a spider to the ceiling.

    Mr Rooney: “WTF is that?”

    Brismod: “That is a chandelier”.

    Mr Rooney: “GTF out. No way. That is as ugly as sin. You must be on the gear that killed River Phoenix.” (In my own defence, at this stage it didn’t have the pretty crystal gibbers on it.)

    Brismod: “WTF would you know? You, you, you.....tradesman!”

    Mr Rooney: “So Wazza, are you going to be able to keep that bastard up there?”

    Wazza:”Yeah no worries. I’m Mr Chandelier, me. I did one specially imported from an Italian castle last month that was over a hundred years old, cost more than forty grand and took me, Carlo and a crane to lift into place. Cast Iron must have weighed a ton. Yeah me, Chandelier expert, no worries.”

    Mr Rooney to Brismod. “You’re in safe hands here sweetheart” (winks in a patronising manner)

    Lucky for Waz, that you lot don’t know any good ‘Personal Injuries Lawyers’

    Laugh, I nearly........

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  31. How devastating!!!! and unbelievable!!! Is there any way you can re order some of the glass peices? Did they have insurance to be such wonderful chandelier experts?!
    Laura x

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  32. 'Sue him' I say.

    Very sad but lucky not worse. I have a chandelier and I can tell you it has all manner of bolts and screws and buttressing to keep it in place. But that is because we told the sparky we are lawyers and he instantly became Concerned and Paranoid. Good qualities in a tradesperson but usually lacking in their She'll Be Right Mate universe.

    I think Mr Rooney is implying the chandelier fell because it was ugly?

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  33. Ahhh Anita. The first blog I get back to after another month away and I am torn between laughing fit to kill myself and curling up into the foetal position myself!! My garage still has 10 crystal chandeliers waiting for me to fix up, hanging over my head, so to speak. Thank God for Mr Rooney. Over here you get the same bungle, and no humour!! With ya in spirit babes!!!

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  34. Sorry but I'm with Mr Rooney ... that is one ugly light. I think Wazza did you a favour. Sorry ... I know I sound mean ... but its the truth and no one else on this blog was willing to tell you (except of course Mr Rooney who obviously has impeccable taste).
    Natalie

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  35. I wouldn't be so hasty Natalie.

    It is a well known fact that I am a complete philistine. I would not know something classy and stylish if it jumped out and bit me on the bum.

    I would love to think that 'the chandelier' was somehow repelled from the ceiling due to it's overwhelming ugliness. However, that is not true.

    It succumbed to the immutable laws of Newtonian Mechanics because Wazza had a complete, and totally uncharacteristic, brain infarction.

    This is the sort of thing that happens on the big jobs.

    Worst case, is that somebody is going to have to apply extra make up to Jas' upper thigh area, to hide the 'exploding chandelier incident' scars; next time he does a nudie photo shoot.

    He's going to hate that.

    I know.

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  36. Anonymous Natalie. Seriously, your comment was the most hilarious of all!

    And Mr Rooney I bet that was the first time anyone said you had impeccable taste in home decor! A new career in design blogging, maybe?

    Thanks for the giggle! xx

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  37. oh maaaaaaaaaaaaaan, i would have turned blue. and then i would have drawn a breath (after a very long time) and then i would've attached several expletives as a prefix to wazza's name. poor bugger, probably feels dreadful though does he??

    glad to hear you only lost 9 drops though. do you think ebay may cover it? surely someone must have a few spare somewhere. crossing fingers and toes xx

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