Thursday, 26 August 2010

Home advice for Bob

Australian politics is in limbo after last weekend's election. The fate of the nation rests on the decision of four independents and a Green and whether they will support either a Labor or Coalition minority government.

It has been said a thousand times before, but let me repeat it here, there have never been more interesting times in federal politics!

Dear old Bob Katter, the federal member for the Queensland seat of Kennedy, Australia's third largest electorate, is one of those independents. This seat represents most of rural Queensland in the north.

Bob is a potential king or queen maker and any other adjective, depending on your personal assessment of him. A very subjective description, I would add.

Anyway, what kind of home does Bob live in? I saw a photograph of Bob's Charters Towers home in Tuesday's Courier Mail and I was utterly fascinated with his decorating style.

Bob Katter at home image from here 
It is by no means a grand home as the walls and ceilings are fibro, but it is still very elegant at first glance.

Look at the lovely silvery grey formal sofa. It has a superior shape and the colour is so now. I would probably suggest some Orla Kiely cushions with a hint of pink and blue. A bright pop of colour against a neutral palette. They'll look stunning.

(Bob, if you're reading this, you should not throw your legs over the arms like that, if you want the chair to remain in tip top condition.)

Bob also has an eye for classic Queen Anne style furniture. Very tasteful. And I'm glad he was not tempted to spray paint them white, as is so fashionable now. The timber seems to be very good quality.

I would mix up the items in the crystal cabinet. Mid-century modern glassware from Iittala would look fabulous with the silverware in this traditional cabinet. My advice is that less is more - a few accent pieces only.

Portraits of one's political heroes (Red Ted), in the home, seem a bit stuffy. Bob, again if you're reading this, you  need to email me and I'll send you the name of a few indigenous artists. Their modern aboriginal paintings are highly sought after. It will totally transform the tone of this space and you'll be seen to support a chunk of your electorate too. Win, Win.

The chandy above the dining table gets the big thumbs up. Perfect, Bob. I do need to warn you though, my thrifty shabby chic readers will be harassing you about where you found that delicious piece of bling!

There are two words you need to absorb. Feature wall. That back wall is screaming for colour. A four litre tin of dulux warm grey. You won't regret it.

Sadly Bob, it appears your wife, Susie, lost the argument about how to display your weapons...

Yes, yes, I know you must decorate and surround yourself with the things you love. That's what the decor lifestyle blogs have us believe...However, I suggest you rethink this particular look - a different paradigm is needed. The bayonets and Enfield rifles should really go in your study. Preferably, in a locked cabinet.

Your next lot of dinner guests, Tony and Julia, will thank me for this advice.

p.s Bob, I could do with a few more followers. Julia let me down after all my good advice a few months ago. The subscribe button is on the right. xx


  1. That was genius. The Chaser boys will be after you for a guest spot next election for sure! Funniest election thing I've read yet...thank you!! x

  2. Hi Anita, You are such a talented lady! I don't know about the Chaser boys let's go for Oprah. Absolutely brilliant - can't wait for a synopsis on Mr Rabbit's abode.
    I still have a smile on my face when I think of Bob Katter and Orla Kiely cushions???

  3. Too too funny, And generally Bob Katter only makes me laugh nervously...

  4. Hilarious! I'm sure those firearms need to be in some sort of secure lock-up .. but then that might be the State intruding on certain Freedoms!

    Possibly Kevin Rudd was sitting under the bayonette when Julia et al. struck, and it was that which stabbed him in the back!

    Sensible tip about seating posture, too. Let's hope Mr Katter doesn't recline like that in the Lower House.

  5. At least the guns take the focus off the split system! Great post! A-M xx

  6. Maybe we could sand back the guns and paint them white to tie in with the split and mount them on a mirror to make it look like there is more of them.........
    Great post.

  7. It is probably illegal in Victoria to have your weapons on display but as we know anything goes in FNQ. Great photo and advice. I am guessing he is sitting in 'The Good Room' which probably doesn't get much of a workout. I must say I would find it hard to concentrate having dinner with Bob. He scares me. xoxo

  8. Oh m'dear, when did politicians ever listen?
    I like Elements idea for painting the guns white...

  9. You're so clever! That Bob is a real card, isn't he?

  10. You are a funny one! You make us all laugh, funny post. ;-)

  11. Love you ideas and Elements regarding the guns .. perhaps alternating them pink and aqua to match the cushions or is that a big much? ... and don't forget the bayonette, perhaps paint that to bring some more pink on the grey feature wall. Bob's a bit of a worry really!

  12. When Bob follows you, would you drop me a quick line so that I can unfollow and refollow right next to him? Thanks!

  13. Too funny Anita!!! Got a giggle out of reading the comments too:o)

  14. Thanks for the laugh, fantastic post! If we don't laugh, we'll most certainly cry..Rachaelxx

  15. The guns on the wall and the state of his shoes says it all - Bob, like me - must be a real c***. (P.S. Those are old guns with obsolete ammo - I wonder what's in his real cabinet?)

  16. Too funny Anita! Although to think that the fate of the nation is sitting with that rabble of disenfranchised ex-Nationals is keeping me awake at night. I asked MOTH the other night what Bob's stance on the Arts might be & he fell off his chair laughing!
    Millie ^_^

  17. Love reading your political satire!! It also begs the question .... who took the photo at that angle?? Michelle

  18. haha this is great. of course, i have no idea who bob is, but his sofa rocks!
    he looks like a fun dud too
    have a great weekend
    ~laura x

  19. LOL! Love this Anita! Just stopping in to say hi..:) Hope all is well with you guys!

    Big Hugs ~ Teresa

  20. I love this! Quite the insight into The Man In The 10-Gallon Hat.

  21. Oh my- absolutely hilarious but spot on decorating advice. Perhaps you should be running the country lol.


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